아침에AROMA.

#004 [ONE-SHOT] That Hot Girl.

2008-08-04T12:54:39Z

Title: That Hot Girl.
Author: kyuppuccino
Pairing: Zhou Mi / Kyuhyun
Rating: NC-17 (for cussing and graphic sex)
Prompt: sujukinkmeme ㅡ crossdressing, Zhoumi loses a bet and it ends up with loud sex.
Word-count: 6649 words.
Extra info: Zhou Mi will be wearing this top, and this skirt.
Comments: very much beta-ed for once! Thank you, Jen.

The first to set foot in the dorm is Zhou Mi: he leaves his shoes at the front door for everyone to tiptoe around, and quickly storms his way in and out of the living room, slamming the door shut behind him. Dinner will be ready soon, but that’s the last thing on his mind right now; he isn’t hungry anyway, so why bother at all?

After the quarrel that took place backstage, Zhou Mi decided to ignore everyone throughout the whole ride back to the dorm — he surely didn’t need anyone’s pity. Never before had he been so content with having to use separate cars instead of the van, as it allowed him to avoid the person that was bringing him so much distress. The other five members of Super Junior M let out a sigh of relief at the newfound peace; however, once back home, Zhou Mi could no longer ignore the other boy’s existence as, sadly, they've been sharing a room for the past few months.

A string of curses leaves Kyuhyun’s mouth in a barely audible whisper as he stomps his feet down the hallway and proceeds to kick open the door behind which Zhou Mi disappeared. The group’s manager shakes his head in disappointment and silently motions for the rest of the boys to go to the kitchen — where their own safety is assured — before further obscene incoherencies can reach their not-so-very virgin ears.

Nevertheless, loud cries and obvious noises of a ferocious argument can be heard all the way to the kitchen, but they know better than to intervene: eyes are kept downcast and their voices are much quieter as they try hard to concentrate on the bowls before them, poking at the food with their chopsticks. As much as they utterly wish for the fight to be over and the screaming to cease, they know that it's definitely none of their business.

“Get out!” Zhou Mi’s irritated voice rises a few octaves in his angered state.
“This is my room too!” Kyuhyun shouts back, walking up to the older boy.
“I… I don’t care! I said I w-won’t do it.” Zhou Mi stutters in broken Korean, taken aback by Kyuhyun’s challenging eyes.
“You lost a bet, gege.” The younger boy states matter-of-factly as he takes a step closer, “Deal with it.”

The room is immersed in a frightening silence for an instant; the only slightly perceptible sounds are those of their uneven breathing. Zhou Mi narrows his eyes and glares, his face is tinged red with a mix of anger and embarrassment. Suddenly, he tries to retort with a witty remark out of extreme anxiety, but nothing comes to his mind. Kyuhyun stares into the other’s eyes, his gaze equally inquisitive. After what seems like forever, Kyuhyun shoots a spiteful glance at his lover, and voices out thoughts he kept bottled up inside him for far too long.

“Then admit it for once, gege! Do you care more about your reputation, or me?”

Zhou Mi’s eyes widen considerably when such accusatory words fall from Kyuhyun’s lips. He takes a step forward and ultimately closes the short distance that is separating them; he raises his hand in a swift movement as if to strike the younger boy, but catches himself before damage can be done. When Zhou Mi roughly pushes Kyuhyun, though, the younger boy clumsily loses balance and falls back on the bed, a look of apparent shock paints his face. Zhou Mi had never been violent with him before, in any form. It didn’t even look like he was capable of doing any harm, that girl, but apparently he actually was. He might have not slapped Kyuhyun this time, but shoving him seemed just as bad. The older boy’s eyes are filled with rage and incredulity, both arms still stretched out before Kyuhyun and a steady finger pointing at him with confidence.

“Do you really think that low of me?” Zhou Mi throws his hands up in frustration, “What if… ah! Fuck it, Kui Xian! Do I look that egocentric to you?”
“Why?” Kyuhyun spits reproachfully, “What am I supposed to think when you will do nothing to prove me wrong?”
“Is that so?” Zhou Mi’s voice breaks and his hands tremble visibly. Soon, tears begin to trace a path down his cheeks, but he’s quick to wipe at them with his sleeve. Kyuhyun lowers his gaze and stares at the floor, his face doing little to hide the emotions nagging at his heart, yet he tries hard to appear unaffected. He is angry with Zhou Mi, no matter how trivial the reason is. Nevertheless, making him cry is definitely not what he was trying to accomplish.

“Look gege,” Kyuhyun sits up from his awkward position on the bed and exhales loudly as he tries to calm down. “I understand that it’s a stupid bet, I can also see why you’re so stubborn and want to reject my request, but can’t you do it for me… just this once?”

Zhou Mi looks at the younger boy dumbfounded, hurt apparent in his eyes. The older boy is unsure of what to say, or how to react to that. However, before he’s even given the chance to formulate a rational thought, Kyuhyun resumes talking. “Are you… I don’t know! This is stupid! Are you afraid of being judged? We aren’t going anywhere, we can do it here.”

For a moment, the older boy forces his brain to process the information and let it sink in. Ever so slowly, he tries to think of something to say, something coherent and mature, but it seems that Kyuhyun’s words made all his brain cells implode. “I… I mean, you really want to see me like that?” With that, Coherency and Maturity bid him farewell for the rest of the night.

Kyuhyun’s jaw drops, literally. He doesn’t know whether to cry or laugh at his lover’s naivety, he seriously can’t believe his ears, is it that hard to see, really? They had been together for seven months already for God’s sake and sex was turning out to be more than a little boring already. Kyuhyun likes to try different things, situations, and this, well, this seems like a great opportunity.
“Hell yes, Zhou Mi ge.” Kyuhyun breathes out in a low whisper, hands clenched at his sides in a vain attempt to control his inner instincts.

Zhou Mi is so close, yet so far away. It’s such a cliché, but so true. Kyuhyun closes his eyes tightly before continuing. The younger boy isn’t embarrassed per se, but can't bear to look into Zhou Mi’s eyes as he speaks up once more. “I do, I want to see you in a damn skirt, I want you to wear make-up and I want to fuck you until you beg me to stop. I really do.”

“Oh.” is all Zhou Mi can intelligently say as his cheeks welcome all shades of red.

It’s a mere two hours later that Kyuhyun hears a soft knock on the door and a feeble request for permission to come in. He already knows who it is, without having to wait for the familiar voice to come from the other side. Quickly, he sets down the magazine he was lazily flipping through and sits up in bed, shifting a little to find a more comfortable position.

“Kui Xian, can I come in?”

Kyuhyun doesn’t get to respond (even if he wanted to protest and tell the other that he took so fucking long he was falling asleep) because, a second later, Zhou Mi awkwardly makes his way into the room and struggles to walk past the piles of clothes, books, and shoes scattered all over the floor. The younger boy stares; he is frozen on the spot, so he all he can do is stare.

The older boy is now standing before him: tall, classy and beautiful. His short pitch-black hair is slightly parted to the side and minuscule silver hairclips miserably try to keep it in place. Unruly tufts of hair are falling in his face, and Kyuhyun feels the urge to twist the ends and push them back to take a better look at the hidden dark orbs. There’s a thin trace of black eyeliner on Zhou Mi’s bottom eyelids, it accentuates his gaze brilliantly, and a groan dies on the younger boy’s lips.

Kyuhyun takes in every single detail of the stunning sight in front of him, his eyes frantically travel up and down, not wanting to miss an inch. Zhou Mi carefully sits down on the bed, crossing his legs as he places both hands behind his back to support his weight. The miniskirt he’s wearing does little to hide his slender legs as the bottom of it rides up a bit to reveal slightly tan thighs. The skin there is flawless, smooth and with little to no hair at all — he really didn’t think his legs required any shaving.

The outfit seems to be absolutely perfect — if Kyuhyun’s agape mouth is anything to go by, that is — and Zhou Mi mentally compliments himself once again for his taste in fashion. The skirt is short, yes, but not short to the extent of making him look like a slut. The fabric is black and slightly rough to the touch: he has to admit that its constant rubbing against his skin is atrociously teasing him; four large loops hold up a belt of the same material and two equally useless suspenders are attached to it (they are in this year, and he clearly could not refuse being trendy!)

“Kui Xian?” Zhou Mi asks hesitantly when he notices that Kyuhyun has yet to say a thing, “Kui Xian, are you… okay?”

He knows he looks gorgeous and the other man’s lustful eyes are making him gain even more confidence, but he is dying to hear the other’s voice. The older boy is actually starting to enjoy this so-called punishment — losing that bet will probably end up proving itself to be a true blessing for him — and he will make sure that his boyfriend shares his same sentiment.

Kyuhyun swallows hard and very visibly too, he opens his mouth to answer and tell him that yes, he is very much okay, but he also wants to fuck him already, yet the only sound that comes out is ridiculously closer to a strangled moan than a proper word. The younger boy’s face flushes red and feels burning hot; usually, he is the one in control, does all the teasing and makes Zhou Mi hide in embarrassment, but this… this is killing him. It takes a significantly big effort for him to finally speak, and swears to himself that he will make Zhou Mi pay for this humiliation once he can get his brain to function properly.

“Zhou Mi ge…” Kyuhyun says breathlessly as he reaches out with a hand to run his fingertips over the older boy’s thigh. “Zhou Mi, gege.” He repeats more firmly as he leans forward to place both hands on the other’s bare shoulders, and gently pushes him back until he is sprawled out all over the bed, with his long limbs taking up half of it. “Oh God, let me touch you, I want to touch you everywhere.”

“Then do it, Kui Xian.”

Curiosity, desire, and excitement are written all over Kyuhyun’s face, as he moves to straddle the older boy. Their eyes sparkle and Kyuhyun licks his lips before leaning down to deliver the very first and probably last chaste kiss they’ll be sharing tonight. He takes a moment longer to study Zhou Mi’s features, making the latter look on expectantly. The older boy calls out Kyuhyun’s name again, with more insistency this time, as if to urge him on and Kyuhyun just knows what he has to do, and wants to do. He has for a long time now.

The younger boy starts leaning towards Zhou Mi; the closer he gets, the faster their hearts beat, until they can literally feel the pounding in their temples. This is exactly how it was supposed to be: Zhou Mi’s lack of control over the situation is understandable judging from the outfit, and he hadn’t really dreamt of being in charge when he ventured into a woman’s clothing store. He expected Kyuhyun to be able to regain his senses fairly quickly, and apparently he was right, and had been all along: Kyuhyun was too much of a strong and determined man. Zhou Mi doesn’t mind at all anyway, because the thought of Kyuhyun wanting, needing, and touching his body like he’s never done before is enough to make him shiver in anticipation. And he has barely done anything yet.

Kyuhyun’s hands press the other boy’s body down hard, and Zhou Mi writhes impatiently on the mattress. The younger boy's thighs tighten on either side of Zhou Mi’s hips and the latter really wants to entangle their legs together, to get impossibly closer to his lover. However, before he can even move a muscle, Kyuhyun’s waist begins to rotate in slow, torturous movements and his ass rubs directly against Zhou Mi’s crotch. When Kyuhyun stops squirming for a moment, he swears he can feel the other’s cock harden beneath him. It’s a pity they’re still wearing clothes, but Kyuhyun isn’t sure he really wants Zhou Mi to lose that miniskirt as it is the reason he’s so turned on in the first place.

Zhou Mi wants to say something, moan, scream, anything; but all he can do is swallow, because his throat is too parched and Kyuhyun’s lips are suddenly devouring his. The kiss is messy and Zhou Mi eventually senses that Kyuhyun won’t really control his urges anymore, so he thinks fuck it and lets the younger boy give in to all of his inner instincts. Suddenly, Kyuhyun pushes his tongue deeper into the older boy’s mouth, as if he was trying to get it all the way down his throat, and Zhou Mi’s afraid he might choke. A thin trail of saliva escapes and dribbles down Zhou Mi’s chin, only to end up falling onto the fabric of his very expensive Christian Dior top.

When Kyuhyun is finally ready to relent a little, Zhou Mi is gasping and panting and his hands are clutching onto the younger boy’s forearms, leaving red welts in the process. Kyuhyun’s tongue darts out and lashes across the other’s lower lip once again as his hips resume their circular motions; Zhou Mi cries out loudly, unable to resist, and his lover arches a brow as if to question the other’s ability to keep quiet. They aren’t alone at the dorm, they should probably worry about their fellow members’ sanity, but all rationality flies right out of the window when Zhou Mi attempts to get up to divest Kyuhyun of his clothes.

It’s easy, it’s simple, and they just can’t stop now. Kyuhyun helps Zhou Mi sit up, but firmly refuses to get off him, so his lover allows him to sit in his lap. Who cares if the walls are thin anyway? Who gives a damn if they can hear them, it’s not like anyone ever complained when Donghae brought in two random girls, and the bed creaked for a long, long time (Kyuhyun actually wondered how many erections a guy could have in the span of four hours: that boy was full of energies, no doubt). Oh! And what about the time Geng had totally disturbing phone sex with Heechul in the fucking kitchen? No one uttered a word, except for Siwon, but that was because he wasn’t getting any.

Therefore, Kyuhyun doesn’t tell Zhou Mi to be quiet, and doesn’t gag him either (even if he is tempted to); instead, he unhooks the suspenders slowly, one by one, and slides them behind his lover’s back. Zhou Mi bows his head and looks at the trembling fingers that are undressing him with greed. Kyuhyun places his hands on the older boy’s hips and grabs the bottom of his shirt — a white off-shoulder top, with random English words in silver print on the front — and begins to slide it up and off the other’s lean body.

“Are you that impatient, Kui Xian?” Zhou Mi says when he feels Kyuhyun’s hands sneak under his skirt next. Kyuhyun growls louder than he meant to, and crushes his lips against the older boy’s. Tongue, teeth and hands are everywhere on Zhou Mi’s body and Kyuhyun thinks he doesn’t mind at all. When they break apart yet again — Kyuhyun just loved making out — the younger boy isn’t satisfied, so he fists both hands in Zhou Mi’s hair and curls his tongue around the shell of his ear, sending shivers down the other’s spine. It’s only when that same tongue slides right into Zhou Mi’s ear and teeth nibble on his lobe that the older boy finally cries out: if the other guys hadn’t heard them before, there was no denying that this time it reached their ears.

Kyuhyun licks a path down Zhou Mi’s neck and sinks his teeth into his collarbone, shoulder, and arm. The older boy hisses in pain, but doesn’t stop him, he never would, never will. When Kyuhyun grabs his lover’s hands and directs them under his own shirt, Zhou Mi finally gets a move on and explores a little before opting for further removal of annoying clothing. Kyuhyun’s shirt is tossed on the floor in a heartbeat and Zhou Mi lets his hands touch and his tongue lick obscene paths from collarbone to nipple.

“Say my name…” Kyuhyun begs as a tormenting sensation of desire coils in his lower abdomen, “Say my name, gege, say it!”

Zhou Mi complies because, clearly, no one could ever deny Kyuhyun for too long, and soon he’s chanting Kui Xian, Kui Xian, Kui Xian in a loud voice. Their chests are pressed up together in a hot embrace, and their hands scramble for purchase onto slick backs, scratching red marks on creamy skin.

Kyuhyun eventually loses control of his hips, and if it wasn’t for the fact that he’s always been so fucking stiff, Zhou Mi would call it an amazing lap dance. The movements are fierce, needy and spasmodic: Zhou Mi can feel himself growing considerably harder at that and it’s almost unbearable, and painful. The younger boy reaches down with a hand and furiously rubs his own crotch through his pants, trying to finish as quickly as possible.

“Fucking hell, Kui Xian!” Zhou Mi shouts as he catches both of Kyuhyun’s wrists in his hands, “Can’t you wait?”

The younger boy had never been like this before; usually, it was Zhou Mi who had to try and hold back, wanting to come at the same time as Kyuhyun (they even resorted to using cock rings quite a number of times). Kyuhyun was the perfect lover: always thinking of his boyfriend’s pleasure before his, and he could last for a very long time too, what more could Zhou Mi ask for? Tonight, however, the tables have turned and the older boy is sure it won’t last much longer if he doesn’t do anything about it.

Zhou Mi reluctantly pushes Kyuhyun off his lap and forces him to lie on his back: the younger boy is nearly a sinful vision — more so than Zhou Mi sporting a miniskirt — matted hair, swollen lips, and glazed eyes. Zhou Mi leans down and lovingly places a soft kiss on the tip of his lover’s nose. “Take it slow, Kui Xian,” he tells him as he hooks his fingers through the loops of Kyuhyun’s jeans, “I’m not going anywhere.”

The front of Kyuhyun’s pants looks ridiculously tight and the look on his face just a bit too uncomfortable. Zhou Mi takes over for a moment, encouraging Kyuhyun to fix his irregular breathing. The older boy eventually unhooks his fingers from the belt loops, undoes the single button of the jeans and drags the zipper all the way down, revealing the growing bulge that twitches against soaked underwear.

Kyuhyun bites down hard on his bottom lip, but still can’t manage to stifle a loud moan at the slight contact. The older boy smirks at him, eyes full of knowledge and malice, and when he traces a finger along Kyuhyun’s clothed erection, the strangled cry that escapes the younger boy’s throat is music to Zhou Mi’s ears. “Is it good?” The latter asks, beaming with pride and superiority, and Kyuhyun nods his head fervently.

It’s not long before the younger boy feverishly attempts to get rid of his own pants, though, and Zhou Mi assists him through the process by helping him bend his legs and pulling the material off. Two sets of hands hastily move onto Kyuhyun’s boxers in unison, until Zhou Mi slaps Kyuhyun’s away and narrows his eyes at him, growling predatorily. The younger boy whines, but drops his arms at his sides and allows Zhou Mi to finish what he started.

The older boy softly pats his lover’s side a couple of times, encouraging him to lift his hips. Kyuhyun props himself up on his elbows, seeking leverage, and groans as Zhou Mi pulls his boxers clean off. Kyuhyun’s body spasms and both boys look down with fascination at the newly exposed skin. Kyuhyun’s thick, pulsating cock rests on his stomach, leaking pre-cum onto it, and Zhou Mi’s hands reach for it on their own accord. His fingers circle the base and gently squeeze it, causing Kyuhyun to gasp breathlessly, “Ah, gege!”

Zhou Mi smiles triumphantly, thinking that his lover’s become just a bit too easy — who knew that a miniskirt could do such wonders? Slowly, he leans down to place a dry kiss on Kyuhyun’s erection, only to sneak his tongue out and drag it across the head immediately after. When Zhou Mi blows cool air on his overly sensitive cock, the younger boy braces himself and fists the creases of the bed sheets in his hands. “G-gege,” Kyuhyun’s voice comes out in a high-pitched sigh, “suck it. Suck me off, gege!”

There is something incredibly arousing about those words, never had Kyuhyun’s voice sounded so sensual, and zealous (unless he was singing in Chinese). It’s not the sexual semantic they carry that makes Zhou Mi shiver, but the tone in which they are said. Kyuhyun is imploring, begging for the older boy to pleasure him, and Zhou Mi decides he will give his boyfriend a reason to stop pleading like an inexperienced teenager.

Before complying, however, Zhou Mi crawls atop the younger boy’s naked form and kisses him hard on the mouth, almost brutally. When the older boy is about to pull away, Kyuhyun places a hand on the back of the other’s head and pulls him down again. Their lips meet mid-way, and repeatedly share quick, sloppy kisses; the younger boy’s hips arch up and off the bed in an obvious attempt to press his erection against the other’s stomach, shamelessly seeking glorious friction.

Neither of the two seems to ever get tired of making out, yearning to convey their sincere love for one another in the midst of such overwhelming passion. Zhou Mi reaches down with a free hand and grips Kyuhyun’s cock resolutely, sensing the desperation in his kisses. Firm fingers slide up and down the younger boy’s hardness at a fast pace as their tongues refuse to cease battling for dominance. Kyuhyun lets a strangled cry into the other boy’s mouth, his eyes fly open and his thighs spread apart a little as a violent shudder runs down his spine.

Zhou Mi stills for a moment, and opts for a slower pumping motion upon feeling the familiar wetness of pre-cum sticking to his thumb. He is determined to make Kyuhyun come, and very soon too, but this isn’t how he wants it to happen. The younger boy presses Zhou Mi’s head down harder, uncaring of the fact that their lips will be bruised tomorrow, and God only knows what their manager will say then. At the same time, Kyuhyun finally lets go of the crumpled bed sheets, and grabs the hand on his cock to try and force Zhou Mi to masturbate him faster.

The older boy has other ideas, though, and brushes off Kyuhyun’s insistence. With an immense effort, he manages to free himself from the grasp the younger boy has on him and regains the upper hand. Kyuhyun whines, protests, and pouts, and it’s so fucking adorable that Zhou Mi almost gives in, almost. “Trust me, Kui Xian,” the older boy demands as he stares at the scene before him in sheer enchantment, “I know what I’m doing.”

Hands are on Kyuhyun’s legs as the older boy spreads them wider apart and bends them at the knee, so he can settle between them. Zhou Mi leans down without any hesitation and lets his wet tongue poke the slit of Kyuhyun’s erection. The younger boy’s hands shoot down, his fingers twist into Zhou Mi’s hair, and pull at short strands, causing him to softly whimper in pain. The older boy's head appears to be a complete mess now, as the hairpins are awkwardly beginning to come off, but that's currently not topping the list of his concerns.

Kyuhyun’s throat emits guttural noises, nearly purring in satisfaction already as Zhou Mi gradually takes in an inch or two of his lover’s cock and swallows. The older boy can’t help but notice that pleasing Kyuhyun is far too easy tonight, and it’s making him crave for more and more. The younger boy’s impudent responses feed Zhou Mi’s desire as well, and he fears he might climax observing his reactions alone.

The younger boy’s hips arch up as he tries to push all of his cock past the other’s lips, but Zhou Mi won’t agree with such a needy demand, not yet. The older boy places one of his strong hands on Kyuhyun’s stomach and presses it down roughly, trying to get the point across. His hot breath on Kyuhyun’s wet skin causes the younger boy’s hardness to twitch desperately and Zhou Mi finally decides to stop making him linger for more.

In a hasty motion, the older boy’s free hand blindly searches for Kyuhyun’s, and once he finds it he holds on tightly as he tries to slide more of the other into his mouth. Steadily, Zhou Mi takes Kyuhyun’s erection in to the hilt, and forces his throat to relax and close around it. As ridiculous as it may sound, the older boy has never gone this far before. Usually, Kyuhyun is the one doing all the sucking and fucking (before, during, and after the sex), all Zhou Mi was ever required to do was sit back, loosen up and get fucked.

There’s confidence in the older boy’s eyes, though, and it’s his caring boyfriend that’s lying beneath him, looking up with a trusting gaze. Kyuhyun is not here to judge his performance in bed and, let’s face it, he wishes Zhou Mi would get a fucking move on and just blow him because he can’t take it anymore. The younger boy whimpers pathetically, and since he can’t raise his hips, he resorts to rotating them, encouraging his lover to move.

Zhou Mi’s mouth withdraws a bit, lets go of the sweaty hand he was holding, and he painfully digs his fingertips into the younger boy’s thighs (he will apologize later for the crescent marks his nails might leave). When he hums around his mouthful, Kyuhyun doesn’t really want to restrain himself from being loud, so he releases a series of confused, raucous babbles in the air.

Soon the older boy finds a rhythm, he hurriedly bobs his head up and down, and moist lips work wonders on Kyuhyun’s cock. The younger boy’s eyes are closed in sexual bliss, and his mouth gapes to let out hoarse cries, and allow his tongue to sneak out to wet rapidly drying lips. Upon having been verbally denied the use of his hands, Kyuhyun resorts to tossing his legs around for the next few minutes, trying to relieve some of the pressure.

The older boy learns to master this new form of art pretty soon, and he occasionally releases his lover’s cock to let his thumb smooth over the head, massaging a mix of pre-cum, sweat and saliva into it. At first, Kyuhyun isn't sure of what is going on — never had he experienced such a mind-blowing feeling — and he shakes his head dumbly, trying to clear it from the lust.

Cries, whimpers, and jumbled strings of incomprehensible Korean reach Zhou Mi’s ears. The older boy follows a pattern, keeping up the sweetest of tortures: his fingers grip the younger boy’s hardness, holding him still, and his tongue darts out, giving the head of the other’s erection long, sloppy wipes. Then he closes his mouth around it once again, forcefully sucking on it, only to release it soon after to blow air on it.

Stealing a quick glance at his lover's features, Zhou Mi witnesses a pale face contorted in extreme pleasure. He can feel the vein in Kyuhyun’s cock pulsate under his tongue, as all the blood seems to have rushed from the rest of his body and converged there. "Fuck, gege!" The younger boy roars, “I’m s-so close…”

Zhou Mi would love to make Kyuhyun finish like that, but doesn’t want to risk it in case the younger boy feels too drained for more. He doubts he could ignore the burning sensation between his own legs for long still, so he makes a quick decision, and lets Kyuhyun’s erection slide completely out of his mouth.

The older boy doesn’t say anything, only stretches his body past his boyfriend’s head, and reaches for the nightstand. On the other hand, Kyuhyun is absolutely bewildered, and breaks his lover’s eardrums with a big, incontestable what the fuck? The younger boy seems to awaken from the trance he fell in, and tries to knock Zhou Mi over to inflict on him a highly deserved beating (you just can’t deny a man his pleasure!) However, when the older boy retreats back and drops a condom and a small bottle of lubricant on the other’s stomach, forgiveness is written all over Kyuhyun’s face.

“Fuck me, Kui Xian,” Zhou Mi howls as he rubs his hard, throbbing, and still clothed crotch against Kyuhyun’s, “Just fuck me already!”
“W-what?” The younger boy sputters, all confused and damn turned on.
“I am wearing the skirt,” the older boy states decisively, “I am the girl, and I will get fucked, so just sit the fuck up and get started, or I’m going to find Siwon and sit on him.”

Kyuhyun definitely doesn’t like to be threatened and knows that his hyung is very serious right now, so he softly pushes him back and makes him lie down against the sheets. “Can we…” the younger boy whispers tentatively, “can we keep the skirt?”

Zhou Mi laughs at the innocent request, and he surely won’t disagree if it means that Kyuhyun’s sexual drive will increase ten fold. Nevertheless the game has been dragged out for way too long, and the older boy wishes for his boyfriend to do realize that he isn’t the only one who has hormones. “Yes,” he barks at him, “But can you just hurry up?”

Now that the younger boy has regained a bit of his composure, he moves to sit between Zhou Mi’s legs, and hastily bunches the miniskirt at the hip. What little skin that piece of clothing was still hiding is finally exposed and Kyuhyun’s mouth waters at the sight, but when manly briefs are revealed… he stares in disbelief.

“Err… gege?” The younger boy inquires, “Are these supposed to be sexy?”
“What!” Zhou Mi says mildly annoyed, as if wearing women clothing suddenly lost all meaning for the other, “I felt enough embarrassed already when I had to pick this outfit! I’m not a pervert like you, Kui Xian.”
“No, I mean…” Kyuhyun struggles to find the right words, “Do you… well—”
“Look!” The older boy screeches in utter frustration, “If you haven’t done anything yet at the count of three, I’m calling Siwon!”

A serious look suddenly creeps up Kyuhyun’s face, his eyes darken and narrow at the quivering body before his own. A pair of shaking hands grasps the elastic band of the older boy’s underwear, and begins to slide it off kilometric legs. Zhou Mi sighs in contentment as the material brushes against his aching erection, and he’s finally feeling something that isn’t the result of his own gestures. The older boy hasn’t been touched at all yet, pent-up frustration threatens to make tears spill if his boyfriend doesn’t touch him any time soon.

It happens in an instant, Zhou Mi’s underwear lies forgotten on the floor, both boys are impatient, and eager in an obvious consequence of all the foreplay. Kyuhyun’s fingers fumble with the condom packet, trying to rip the wrapping open with sharp teeth, without damaging the latex. Zhou Mi observes with rapt attention for a second, before he clasps Kyuhyun’s hands in his and brings them downward. The older man helps Kyuhyun roll the condom onto his throbbing erection, watching it leak angrily between his lover’s thighs, and purrs in delight when the younger boy tilts his head to catch his lips in a searing kiss.

As soon as they finally manage to separate — their chins glistening with threads of saliva — Zhou Mi unscrews the lid of the bottle of lubricant, and offers it to his boyfriend. The latter appreciatively takes it, and with a free hand he motions for his lover to get on all fours. It’s been a long time since they’ve done it doggy style and the older boy is anticipating it immensely already. The mattress is soft under his hands and knees, but before he can begin to marvel at the wonderful sensations that will be coursing through his body soon, he feels a finger rubbing his entrance.

Kyuhyun’s eyes struggle to focus (it’s difficult to ignore the miniskirt) and his tongue pokes out as he concentrates on the task at hand. Soon, a long and well-lubed finger is pushing its way past Zhou Mi’s tight ring of muscles, and the older boy sputters a curse word or two in Chinese. No matter how many times they’ve had sex in the past few months, the younger boy will always turn down Zhou Mi’s offer of going at it without preparation. Kyuhyun wiggles his finger around a bit, curls, and rotates it as he amusedly listens to his boyfriend’s protests, unable to comprehend any of them.

Two newly inserted fingers and a wet kiss on Zhou Mi’s ass cheek later, the younger boy is finally smearing the condom with a thin layer of lube. He fails to hold back a loud moan at the contact, and his body jolts violently as he welcomes the mental image of what he’s about to do. The younger boy wipes his fingers on the bed sheets, grabs his boyfriend’s hip with brutal force and uses his free hand to guide his erection right into the other’s ass.

Zhou Mi bellows, literally, and Kyuhyun shudders once again at the feel of the older boy clenching around his hardness unbearably hard. The younger boy keeps pushing in until he’s sheathed all the way to the base, and his legs are pressed hotly against the back of Zhou Mi’s thighs. They stay still for a couple of minutes: the older boy doesn’t need to adjust to the other’s girth, not at all; it’s only that they both know neither will last long if Kyuhyun was to start thrusting already.

“Gege,” the younger boy mutters after a while, “Can I…?”

The older boy doesn’t answer verbally, or at least not in a way that would be considered proper language. He simply scoffs at the retarded question, and chooses to show his boyfriend what he wants. Zhou Mi’s hips push back and for a moment there, Kyuhyun loses all reason and understanding. Soon, however, the younger boy draws his waist back, allowing his erection to slide halfway out, and proceeds to slam it back in, causing his lover to cry out loud in sheer pleasure.

It’s a fairly deep entry and Kyuhyun’s movements are free: he grinds, sways, and rocks his hips against Zhou Mi’s ass, changing the angle with each re-entry. His different motions make the older boy pant louder, and gasp for breath every time he feels his lover’s cock brush against his prostate. At first, Zhou Mi tries excruciatingly hard to match the other’s movements, attempts to time their hips, and further fuel Kyuhyun’s lust. After ten long minutes of agonizing deliberate thrusting, though, Zhou Mi’s arms give out and his upper body falls unceremoniously on the mattress.

Apparently, that is all the younger boy was aiming for, as he doesn’t even give his lover time to find a good position, oh no. He leans over the other’s back and slides his left arm around his waist, seizing the miniskirt, as he brings Zhou Mi’s ass impossibly closer to his groin. Kyuhyun really begins to fuck his boyfriend now, all erratic and fierce pounding. Both boys are screaming and crying out so loud that if their dorm wasn’t on the fifth floor, they might have had to be concerned with the fans’ constant presence outside the building.

Kyuhyun’s eyes roll to the back of his head, while Zhou Mi’s swim in a pool of tears of frustration. When the younger boy places two fingers on his lover’s lips, the latter greedily accepts them, and lets them slide into his mouth. Once the digits are covered in saliva, Kyuhyun brings his right hand down and wraps it around Zhou Mi’s throbbing cock, making the latter scream louder than ever.

Neither of the two boys can hold out much longer, so the younger boy gives in to more irregular, violent thrusts, forcing the side of Zhou Mi’s face into the mattress. The hand on the older boy’s hardness glides up and down with bruising force, and if Kyuhyun wasn’t so lost in his own passion, he’d be worried about hurting the other.

“Kyuon!” Zhou Mi shouts in accented Korean, “Kyuhon! F-fuck, Kui Xian!”

The younger boy is the first to come, his vision wavers a little as he refuses to close his eyes, wanting to see his boyfriend shudder with his own release. He keeps going, just for him: he rotates his waist side to side, and tries to give Zhou Mi as much pleasure as possible. A minute or two go by, and now it’s the older boy’s time to come all over the sheets in thick spurts. His body is pervaded by tremors as Kyuhyun’s fingers squeeze his cock, milking Zhou Mi for all he’s worth.

At last, the older boy’s legs give out too, and Kyuhyun falls onto his lover’s back with little to no regard for his equally weakened state. They’re visibly exhausted, drained, and weary, but undeniably satisfied. After a few minutes, Kyuhyun pulls out and rolls onto his back next to the other’s body. When both heads turn, they look into each other’s eyes, seeing nothing but love, and affection. Their hands search one another, and when they find their target, the younger boy brings Zhou Mi’s to his lips to place a tender kiss on each fingertip.

"The outfit was hot," Kyuhyun confirms reassuringly, "But who the hell is Kyuon?”

Zhou Mi cackles, all large and glistening eyes.

“If I were you, I wouldn’t laugh…” the younger boy smirks at him, “We're going to have to work on that Korean pronunciation of yours. You fail, and real hard too.”

#003 [ONE-SHOT] Of Lies And...

2007-08-07T21:06:47Z

Title: Of Lies And...
Author: kyuppuccino
Pairing: Sungmin / Kyuhyun (slight Kangin / Kyuhyun)
Rating: R (for cussing and implied sex, but it's a rather clean fanfiction)
Summary: Kyuhyun is jealous, and possessive.
Dedicated to: Maylene; and Katrina for reading it first.
Word-count: 7205 words.
Extra info: unusual pattern, partially timed story.
Comments: at the bottom of the page.

It starts early in the morning, when there’s too much caffeine in your system and little goodwil to drag your feet out of the door and off to work. It’s easy for Youngwoon: no strings, no attachments, no promises; it’s pure lust, or perhaps not even that, because Youngwoon just loves controlling people and what better way is there to have someone at your mercy than making waves of pleasure repeatedly strike their nerves? And although Youngwoon professes his heterosexuality every single day and spreads it to the four winds, just for good measure, he doesn’t hesitate in being open with some of the group members when they ask for attention.

It’s only minutes before his hand slides on Kyuhyun’s bare torso and down into his pyjama, just as Kyuhyun’s moist lips attach to his forehead and eyes and nose and ears. Despite the obviously heated situation and what one might think, the younger boy’s concentration falters; he keeps looking towards the same direction, his mouth is connected to his hyung’s skin, but his eyes are darting to the side, wide and alert. He doesn’t seem to be worried, no, definitely not; he looks at ease and his gaze searches and scans the kitchen’s door, as if he were waiting for something to happen. Or, perhaps, someone to come?

Kyuhyun is actually very careful with his actions. He wants it, this pleasure, and he doesn’t; not once he lets Youngwoon kiss him on the mouth, not even briefly or by accident. It’s not his first time doing this, but it’s his first time doing it with someone else, yet he seems to know very well how it has to be. Morals are morals, and although he might be currently distorting them a little, he still has some presence of mind left to tell what is right and what is wrong. Despite the immense pleasure, despite his determination in starting it first by sitting with his legs on each side of his hyung’s thigh, provoking him and riling him up… despite all this, Kyuhyun feels unclean. Not unsure, just unclean.

If you saw him, you would think differently, but Youngwoon isn’t that careless: he is well aware of the other boy’s intimate relationship with another of their group members, so when he asks the younger boy where Sungmin is, Kyuhyun blatantly lies. He isn’t home, he says, who cares about him anyway. And then his arms are on his hyung’s back again, scratching and digging into the warm flesh, probably leaving a red mark or two. Then, suddenly, Kyuhyun hears someone drop whatever-it-was that he was holding — later he finds it to be only a bottle of milk scented shampoo — and as he manages to catch a quick glimpse of messy blonde hair, a groan dies in his throat.

On one hand Kyuhyun wants to stand up and follow the source of running footsteps, but on the other he is content with the result. In fact, much to Youngwoon’s bewilderment, after the initial emotional reaction has worn off, Kyuhyun doesn’t look as shocked as he should. He’s smirking, now, and his eyes light up like a child’s. Astonished, the oldest pushes him off roughly in a surge of anger, staring down at him as the other boy falls on his ass: his long limbs reduced to an awkward mess, sprawled on the kitchen floor tiles.

“You’re an idiot.” Youngwoon says in a jumble of stuttered syllables, his icy gaze focused on Kyuhyun, eyes directly piercing the younger’s. “I may have no morals, but I would never hurt any of the other members on purpose.”

Kyuhyun is surprised and for a moment he doesn’t react. He simply remains still, with his mouth gaping like a fish out of water, as if to say something at least, but Youngwoon cuts him off before he can even think of an excuse. “Drag me into another of these fucking stunts of yours and it won’t be pretty. Fucking jerk.” He points an accusing finger at the boy on the floor, his eyes still glaring and menacing, then he storms off. Kyuhyun doesn’t move yet, instead he listens, carefully: his hyung’s thumping footsteps echoing through the hallway, heading toward the general direction of the fleeting blonde head’s room, he’s sure.

It seemed like a good idea, yesterday; but not anymore, not now.

06:11 PM — Sungmin realizes that this isn’t what he really wanted, but Lee Sungmin is proud and Lee Sungmin doesn’t apologize when he isn’t wrong, so when Kyuhyun steps into the kitchen and meets his gaze later that day, all he does is scoff and leave the room with his nose high up in the air. Pride is everything to a man. A hyung shouldn’t even be doing the dishes anyway; what are younger members there for? Once he’s out of the other boy’s sight, however, his resolve breaks a little: he sighs as he realizes that Kyuhyun usually dries the dishes with him, but he’s made up his mind already and he won’t go back — he can't let him win this time.

06:24 PM — Kyuhyun slams the cabinet shut after having put away the last few glasses. The sink is a mess and no matter how many times he scrubs and no matter how pruney his fingers are, these plates are definitely ganging up on him and refusing to get cleaned. He stares at them hard, in disbelief, as if his angry gaze could intimidate them. He thinks there’s nothing he can do about it: they will never shine like Sungmin’s freshly washed plates do. As he moves to pile them up, he thinks that perhaps he could ask his hyung to teach him how to do it right, but Cho Kyuhyun is younger, and although surprisingly more mature, he won’t admit defeat, not this time.

06:30 PM — Sungmin’s cellphone vibrates in his pocket, he reaches for it as quickly as he can: he is sure it is Kyuhyun calling him from the other room — it wouldn’t be the first time happening — so he really has a good excuse to pout and snort when he realizes it’s only the alarm clock informing him that an M.net Special on Song Hyegyo in Paris is airing soon. Oh well, better than nothing, he thinks as he shuffles his feet making his way to the living room. Suddenly he finds himself flattened against the door to one of the boys’ rooms as an hyperactive Donghae runs past him with an tin foil funnel atop his head, a water bottle in hand and a frightened look on his face: Sungmin decides the younger boy has watched “Signs” too many times already. As he moves to detach himself from the door, he makes mental note of disposing of said DVD in the trashcan and replacing it with something less dangerous, something like “Aladdin” perhaps. Soon he realizes that he hates the soundtrack with a passion though, so he convinces himself that “The Lion King” is much cuter and for a moment he hates himself as well for thinking of that animation movie first. Old habits die hard.

06:32 PM — Zapping has never been so easy and the programs never so boring; suddenly Kyuhyun catches a glimpse of the Tour Eiffel and he stops on that channel: this monument has always looked so fascinating to him, he even bought a storyroom background of it for his cyworld. But then, Song Hyegyo’s smiling face pops out of nowhere on the screen and he knows she’s scorning him with that smile, so he jeers at her and immediately switches channel, opting for a Jumong rerun. He knew it since the beginning that she’s a talentless actress and she could never beat his Song Il Gook.

06:33 PM — Noises coming from the television catch Sungmin’s attention and before he can yell at whoever is hogging it… he spots him. Kyuhyun is lying on the couch in a wifebeater and a pair of boxers only, his legs spread apart: one dangling off the couch and the other resting on the header. He looks up and their eyes meet for a second until Kyuhyun groans in displeasure and focuses back on the screen. Sungmin stares at him disbelievingly for a moment longer, his brain telling him it’s not worth it, but something else is pressing and insisting that there’s only one way to make up with Kyuhyun. It doesn’t even need words and it works more often than not, but he already decided he won’t let him win. After one last longing glance at Kyuhyun’s legs, Sungmin wishes he were female today as he finds himself walking funnily all the way to Hyukjae’s room, searching for the latter’s PMP for a little assistance.

07:17 PM — Kyuhyun wishes he had a different schedule today; he anxiously thinks of the members living in his own dorm, one by one, and tries to remember what they’ll be doing tonight. All the bigger hyungs and Hyukjae will be busy with M!Countdown and their own radio shows. That would leave Donghae out, but he knows that alien hyung will probably be off to help Ryeowook improve his dancing into the wee hours of the morning. However, he also knows that they’ll waste a good amount of time eating strawberries, only to come back with indigestion and get scolded again. He thinks of the boys in the other dorm and Siwonie hyung, but none of them ever goes on radio and asking Heechul hyung for a favour would be the same as condemning himself to a few months of sacrifices. He sighs and lets his head flop down on the couch cushion, hoping that it will come to life and swallow him whole like a giant dionaea.

08 PM — Sungmin nonchalantly walks back to the living room; only to find Kyuhyun asleep on the couch, but in a more prude position this time and he thanks the Heavens for being on his side for once. He looks at the board with their schedule on the wall and nearly gets a heart attack at the realization, his legs wanting to give out and his lungs protesting for air: « 070809 CBJC Radio — DJ: Sungmin; GUEST: Kyuhyun (PART 1 – viewable radio) » Sungmin shakes his head, rubs his eyes and considers running a finger over the outline of Kyuhyun’s name to cancel the evidence, but the manager hyungs aren’t stupid and he’s sure they will immediately catch on. Lee Sungmin can’t escape now, but he runs to his room anyway.

08:28 PM — The older boy moans and purrs as Kyuhyun runs his hands under his hot pink POLHAM shirt and his fingertips do wonders once they reach higher up. He lets those same hands tug his shirt up and off. Kyuhyun’s mouth doesn’t waste time and his lips immediately attach to a nearly invisible collarbone and they suck and bite leaving marks of ownership. Then he’s kissing him; Kyuhyun’s lips are gentle at first, the kiss is chaste and pure unlike their earlier actions, but soon it becomes more forceful, tongues meeting and rolling and curling for dominance. Kyuhyun can’t breathe, it feels as if he ran out of oxygen, so he pulls away, but he still can’t breathe and Sungmin is smiling and subtly smirking as Kyuhyun stumbles in his steps, his arms at his throat as if he could tear it open to try and breathe and then a sharp pain runs through his body.

08:28 PM — It won’t be long before manager Minsung comes to fetch the boys for schedule; Sungmin sighs in defeat, grabs his things and heads for a shower. Once out of his room, soft gasping sounds followed by a pleasure filled whimper reach his ears, catching his attention. Taking a few more steps towards the source of such noises, his eyes are greeted by the sight of Kyuhyun writhing on the couch: eyes shut tight and harsh moans coming out of his full lips. Sungmin’s stomach is twisting and knotting and suddenly he can’t take it anymore, so he grabs the nearest pillow and presses it on Kyuhyun’s face, completely covering it in hope to shut him up, to block the sounds. The younger boy flails his arms and brings them at his own neck and then he starts convulsing on the couch. Only then the offender smiles in victory and scampers off to the bathroom just as Kyuhyun falls to the floor with a yelp and a loud thud. That shall teach you to moan dreaming about other people, the older boy thinks, knowing he’s right; once in the bathroom he gets rid of all his clothes and steps under the spray of water, letting it wash away his tears.

09:41 PM — Kyuhyun is sitting in the backseat, his arms folded over his chest and a look full of spite on his face. His eyes closed to mere slits, burning holes in the back of Sungmin’s head. Waking up with his ass on the floor and a pillow in his mouth hadn’t been pleasant and it didn’t take him long to put two and two together and figure out what had happened. He knows that Sungmin knows that he knows and then he thinks that knowing too much gives him a headache, so he stops thinking and proceeds to count the number of fingers he could break on Sungmin’s hands without compromising schedule. However, that could get him kicked out of the dorm instead, perhaps even out of the group and he really doesn’t want to be remembered as the transitory member of Super Junior with no discipline at all. Oh no.

10:30 PM — Sungmin thinks that hypocrisy has never been so bittersweet and so cruel too. Kyuhyun is smart and not once does he let anyone understand what is actually going on between them. The staff, Sooyoung, the viewers, the listeners… no one but the manager knows. The boy keeps smiling and cracking jokes, if he so much dared to subtly insult Sungmin or make fun of him in quite the ironic way, no one would notice the truth lying behind his pungent words. That’s exactly how bratty he’d always been on CBJC Radio with Youngwoon hyung and he really enjoys how this power of his is coming in handy today. Sungmin, on the other hand, feels uneasy: Kyuhyun’s voice, his smile, the sound of his melodic laughter, the way his eyes grow bigger in size for a split second as he sings, the way they shine brightly, how his tongue rolls as he sings bits of his most favourite Disney song… everything is driving him nuts. No matter how angry the older boy is, this just isn’t helping him keep his cool.

00:26 AM — It’s awkward; thousands of thoughts are running through Kyuhyun’s mind and he just lets them, as he is unable to grasp just one and concentrate on it. Sooyoung’s dorm is on the way to their own, so they give her a ride, as usual. Kyuhyun doesn’t mind, as long as he’s there to control the situation, and as they have schedule early in the morning tomorrow, taking a nap in the car sounds like a good plan. As soon as his head comes into contact with the window, however, he knows he won’t be able to sleep. Eventually, those thousands of thoughts become a single, confused one and the words SUNGMIN • THIGH • PILLOW are all he can make out before he decides — no, he actually admits — that he really misses his hyung.

00:34 AM — It’s ridiculous; Sungmin stares out of the car window trying to ignore his surroundings, because radio left him with a feeling of bitterness tonight and he just can’t manage to get rid of it now. It’s dark outside, save for the rare, few street-lamps that try their best to bless him with the view of Kyuhyun’s reflection in the fibreglass window. He isn’t looking towards his direction, but he’s biting nervously on his lip and there’s a frown fixated on his face. Sungmin closes his eyes tight and attempts to dispel that image before he loses even the last bit of self-control he has. However, just as he tells himself that he’s strong and he can do it, his iPod backstabs him and begins to play his favourite song: each word, each line in the lyrics is like a needle going in and out of the heart beating angrily in his chest and tears run freely down his cheeks, uncaring of the makeup.

00:35 AM — Although it’s summer and the weather is hot and humid and disgusting enough to cause people to suffer from the heat, Kyuhyun feels cold. The car window does nothing to make him feel any better, so he shifts position and he does everything with his eyes closed as to not have to meet Sungmin’s gaze, even by accident. He slumps in his seat a little and draws his legs closer to his chest, only to rest a cheek on his knees: it’s uncomfortable and his balance is precarious, but as much as he’s dying on the inside for physical contact, he knows Sungmin is furious and he would only get pushed away if he touched him. Right now, he doesn’t think he could take rejection, not when he really wants the other to hold him, to love him. Regret has gradually started to consume him and he can’t seem to be able to find a way to escape, because it was solely his fault since the beginning.

00:36 AM — “This must be all I dream, when I wake up you'll be back. I try to reassure my broken heart but you're walking further away. I feel sorry for myself as I cry watching you leave.” The song plays monotonously and as each second passes Sungmin’s defences break, leaving him with cravings he really doesn’t want to admit to himself. He hears movement to his left, he can feel the younger boy shifting position and he snaps his eyes open, in hope to catch his gaze through the reflection in the glass, even by accident, but he knows Kyuhyun is angry and he will only get ignored. Right now, he doesn’t think he can take rejection, not when he really wants the other to hold him, to love him. Closing his eyes once again, he blindly presses his fingers to his tear-stricken cheeks and rubs them gently just as the song draws to an end, “If you really loved... if you loved me, turn around once even if it's while you leave.”¹

00:40 AM — Sleeping is something Kyuhyun just can’t do when his heart aches so much; the thought of how sweet and comfortable and carefree Sungmin’s voice sounded once Kyuhyun’s guest appearance was no longer needed is tormenting him. The sad look on his face was no longer there, his eyes bright and concentrated on doing well, on not disappointing the fans and the staff, on trying to be as good as Youngwoon hyung, or perhaps even better. He misses Sungmin; he misses him the most now, knowing the older boy is sitting only a few centimetres away from him, but he can’t look at him, can’t talk to him, can’t touch him without fearing denial. Kyuhyun wonders if the loud noise of his heart shattering into numerous tiny pieces could be heard by the people surrounding him too.

00:51 AM — The car comes to a stop opposite to a dark building and Sungmin takes out an earphone for a second as his manager informs him that he’ll be escorting Sooyoung to her dorm and will be back soon. For a moment, the boy wonders why Minsung hyung insists on telling him each night, even after nearly two months of radio activities, but soon he loses interest in the thought and lets it go unanswered. Not even a second passes before Sungmin is pressing the earphone back in place, just in time for BlACKBeat to finish singing “Don’t Tell Me” and for the next track to start playing, whichever it may be.

00:52 AM — Kyuhyun doesn’t see, but he feels the car halting. He listens to his manager tell them where he's going and still pretends to be sleeping just to avoid saying his goodbyes to Sooyoung and letting Sungmin know he is awake. The streets are empty, or so he thinks, because he can’t hear a single sound. Deep down he hopes Sungmin is looking at him, but he’s very aware of it being mere wishful thinking. Despite his wish, soon his eyelids start twitching a little and, although almost imperceptible, he’s afraid of being unable to keep them closed under Sungmin’s possible stare, thus he finds himself praying for his hyung to be ignoring him instead. Cho Kyuhyun, you’re a big mess. Make up your mind.

00:55 AM — A newfound hatred for his iPod and any other mp3 playing device possesses Sungmin’s heart; he forces himself to press forward and stop listening to this because he has his nerves on edge, but the song is faster than his will and soon Kyuhyun’s voice can be heard and Sungmin knows that this time they have really fucked up. Both of them. No matter what. He doesn’t press forward, but he presses pause: Kyuhyun’s words replay in his head like a rigmarole, a lullaby. “Take my hand...take my hand...take my hand...”² — they tease him and they seem to tell him what Kyuhyun can’t voice out, can’t do, or at least he wants to believe that it is the case.

00:57 AM — The younger boy hears it, the familiar soft click of an iPod button being pressed. Kyuhyun doesn’t know why, but he’s scared; he’s scared of being alone with Sungmin in such silence and darkness and although his eyes are closed already, he shuts them even tighter until they hurt. The car’s door opens abruptly, and a feeling of reassurance pervades Kyuhyun’s senses, but then he realizes the sound came from the wrong direction, not what he was expecting. And then there’s shifting on his side he opens his eyes wide only to catch a blurred glimpse of Sungmin’s legs and fingers before he slams the door shut once again.

01:00 AM — A cool night breeze catches Sungmin by surprise as he leans against the car, but it’s refreshing and it makes him feel alive, so he welcomes it with a half smile. He looks around: the streets are deserted and for a moment he’s really envious of the people who live close by, because peace and quiet is something he’s been lacking and missing ever since Super Junior was formed. He really misses being a trainee sometimes. He abandons himself to this feeling of freedom and suddenly feels more relaxed, he can feel his nerves finally loosen up a bit. The cool wind ruffles his short blonde hair and tickles his rosy tinted cheeks; he inhales deeply and closes his eyes just as the door on the other side slides open.

01:02 AM — It isn’t long before the younger boy gives in to his instinct, something is telling him that he has to do it, that Sungmin leaving him alone in the car was actually a hint, an open invitation and Kyuhyun finds that he really can’t resist. Dragging his feet, he too leans against the car, right next to the older boy, but not a word is uttered. He can hear the feeble ticking sound of Sungmin’s multicoloured watch as the seconds go by. One… two… three… four… five… s— and then Sungmin is kissing him. Kyuhyun slumps a little, allowing the much shorter boy to feel more comfortable in this position; his hands are on each side of him, trapping him between his arms, pinning him against the car, yet he isn’t touching him, not yet. Kyuhyun is shocked at first; he was expecting to argue and hear him scream and cry and eventually they would have talked things out. If Sungmin wanted to hit him and hurt him in any way, he was ready to take it all — if that meant being forgiven and loved again — but Sungmin’s mouth is insistent and soon his tongue is granted access as they both get lost in a desperate, needy kiss and become as one.

01:05 AM — Sungmin moans into the kiss, a familiar sensation burning in the pit of his stomach, his eyes stinging with tears of frustration and happiness mingled together just as Kyuhyun’s hand grabs his and he intertwines their fingers — “Take my hand…” And while Kyuhyun is unsure of what to do with his free hand, Sungmin’s is insatiable and obstinate: it cups the other boy’s face, it tugs at his dark hair painfully hard, and runs its fingers through it; then, it wraps around his neck and pulls his head closer in a breathtaking kiss and, eventually, it slides down, nails scratching across the younger boy’s back through the material of his shirt, eliciting soft gasps and whimpers from the latter as those curious fingers explore and trace teasing patterns.

01:09 AM — Kyuhyun loves kissing; he loves it when he can feel all of the other boy, he loves losing control and making him lose control, he loves it when the tongues battle gets so good and is so passionate that both their legs threaten to give out. Kyuhyun can feel the love and affection through the kiss and he hopes Sungmin can feel it too. Suddenly, however, thoughts of their argument that day begin to torment him: the screams, the shoves, the tears and the anger. He is well aware of what he did; he knows it’s his entire fault and that he should be more accepting, more open and have more faith to make this work. Although it looks like his hyung has forgiven him, Kyuhyun feels like he doesn’t deserve such kindness, he doesn’t deserve Sungmin’s love. He simply doesn’t deserve someone as good as Lee Sungmin.

01:13 AM — Despite being lost in an open mouthed kiss, Sungmin can’t help but sense Kyuhyun’s uneasiness; the younger boy becomes less and less responsive, and Sungmin knows exactly why, but fails to relent. He thinks Kyuhyun tastes nothing like those clichés in the fanfictions he read on the internet: it’s not vanilla, it’s not cherries and it damn well isn’t candy; if he has to be completely honest it isn’t even as pleasant as anyone would wish for, because Kyuhyun tastes sour and salty and it pretty much reminds him of the dinner they just had moments before, but Sungmin is addicted to it already and he doesn’t want to let go. Not ever.

01:18 AM — Slowly, gradually, Kyuhyun begins to push the reluctant older boy away, interrupting a kiss that lasted for minutes and he immediately realizes that they had not been sharing such a sincere and honest kiss in months. His free hand grabs onto Sungmin’s, prying it away from his waist just as it was making its way under his shirt to feel the smooth skin beneath. Kyuhyun feels guilty, he is guilty and he knows the shorter boy can feel it too: he can see it in his eyes as they stare into each other’s. Kyuhyun’s pleading, glistening dark orbs say more than the words he’s trying to grasp ever could, but he can’t look into Sungmin’s eyes for long yet, he doesn’t want to see all the pain he caused him, so he lets go of both his hands and pulls his body close to his chest.

01:21 AM — Silence envelopes them for a moment: Sungmin lets his head rest on Kyuhyun’s chest, feeling his every heartbeat and trying to match it with his, as if he could control it. He tries hard; he tries to hold his breath, he presses himself harder against the younger boy’s body, he wants to be part of him and he wants to be sure he isn’t imagining all this. His arms wrap around Kyuhyun’s waist; it’s small, it’s thin, and it’s tiny and Sungmin can’t help but think of the accident again, the weight loss and all of its consequences; despite such thoughts, though, his arms squeeze the younger boy’s body as if to prove him that he’s still there, with him, and he wishes it could be forever.

01:22 AM — Kyuhyun groans at the pressure the other boy’s arms apply to his waist, but it’s not pain, it’s the knot in his throat that threatens to make him cry. He buries his nose in Sungmin’s soft, blonde hair and inhales deeply, welcoming the scent of a sickeningly sweet shampoo that quickly spoils his nostrils. While one of his hands is firmly holding onto Sungmin’s back as if to keep him in place, to prevent an unexpected retreat, the other cradles the boy’s head, smoothing the hair on its back and tugging at it lightly. He sighs in contentment upon hearing the other purring softly and he begins to feel relaxed enough to finally speak his guilt.

“I…”

Breathe, now. Breathe.

“I’m sorry.”

I know.

“I can’t even find the right words…”

I can read them in your eyes though.

“Sungmin…”

Say it again.

“Lee Sungmin…”

Again, say it again. Again, again, again.

“I don’t deserve you.”

NO! Don’t leave. Nononon—

“But…”

…

“I have come to depend on you.”

I can’t breathe without you.

“I will learn.”

Your heartbeat…

“I will be more confident and I will have more faith.”

I just wish you would trust me.

“I know you would never hurt me, but…I don’t trust the…others, you know.”

They are work. She—is—work.

“When I see other people talking to you or touching you…”

Work. Work. Work.

“I can’t take it. I want to make you mine and claim you and kiss you in front of everyone and make you jealous so that you will desire me more. I want to tell them I love you and show them that you’re mine and no one else can have you. Keeping my feelings to myself, hiding from everyone, and living in a lie…I don’t know how to do it.”

I’ll teach you. Don’t give up. Not now.

“I know I was wrong and I’ll be forever sorry, but now I can see it with a different mindset…I think…”

I love you. Iloveyouiloveyouiloveyou.

“…I think I just needed reassurance.”

Can’t you see how much I care?

It’s silent all over again, save for Sungmin’s soft humming into Kyuhyun’s chest. They stay as they are; each lost in his own thoughts, uncaring of who might pass by and see them at such unmistakably intimate proximity. Right now, they are all that matters; the intense bond they share, the beating of their hearts so close together, their love is all that matters.

Deep inside Sungmin knows this isn’t the end to the pain they will consciously — or not? — inflict upon one another, but he would much rather consider it a new beginning for now. Love is never easy, but he knows this is what he wants. He knows that the younger boy’s jealousy and possessiveness will be persistent, he knows it damn well; he won’t give up though, because he is thoroughly convinced that if the good memories outnumber the bad ones then it will be all worth it; the pain and grief and sufferance will be worth it. Their hands will hold onto each other for as long as God will let them.

On the other end of the street, sitting uncomfortably on the pavement in an attempt to hide behind a broken bench, are manager Minsung and Sooyoung. With a few whispered words, the manager ushers the weeping girl towards a tall building and into the elevator. Not even a minute later, he’s walking back to the car and stops next to the couple leaning idly against it. He can’t say anything, this is none of his business; although he’s aware of the fact that many people would disapprove of this relationship, he tells himself that all he cares about is the boys’ happiness after all. And right now he can sense sheer happiness radiating off of their bodies. Abandoning his not-so-very ethical thoughts, he clears his throat softly before speaking and he manages to regain some of his composure, “shall—mmh… ready to go?”

The older boy reluctantly disentangles himself from Kyuhyun’s arms as the latter presses his lips atop his head and gives him one last loving kiss. The car’s door opens enough for Sungmin to climb back in, his body feeling suddenly numb and worn out, crushed by all of today’s emotions. Kyuhyun finds himself facing his manager; he feels unsure of what to do, so he just gives him an apologetic smile and a little bow before joining Sungmin. He doesn’t know exactly why he did it, he isn’t even sure the manager understands, or approves, but that’s the last worry on his mind for today.

The ride back home is quiet; Sungmin quickly falls asleep with his head on the younger’s thigh; a serene smile is gracing his pouty lips and his lithe figure is curled up on the backseat, an arm draped around the other’s waist. As the manager opts for being a silent presence in the car, Kyuhyun is left dealing with his own thoughts once again, clearly unable to stop thinking and fall asleep himself. Memories of their surreal morning still haunting him, hammering away in his brain and making him feel uncomfortable.

It takes about twenty minutes to reach Super Junior’s dorm from Sooyoung’s, Kyuhyun timed the ride before; as he stares out of the window, admiring the night life of Seoul, he is suddenly reminded of Youngwoon upon spotting a guy — or was it a girl? He couldn’t tell — wearing a cow suit and dancing drunkenly in the streets. He chuckles, and then frowns as he remembers how he wrongfully used his hyung to build up Sungmin’s jealousy and he feels the sudden urge to talk to him. It’s late, though, and it will be even later once home; he doesn’t want to risk waking up the other members sleeping in his same room just to talk to him face to face, so he decides it can wait until next morning.

Despite his decision, however, he slowly slides his hand in his jeans pocket and retrieves his cellphone as carefully as he can, as to not awaken his sleeping boyfriend. The latter stirs slightly: a soft mewl escaping his lips before smacking them once, twice and then a third time quite loudly; seemingly satisfied, he snuggles closer to Kyuhyun, his nose buried in a place the younger boy would never want their manager to witness. He shifts a little and feels Sungmin tightening the grip on his waist, so he lets his free hand fall on top of his head and resorts to playing with blonde strands of silky hair that the boy so much loves messing up during broadcast.

Type.
« Hyung... I’m sorry about this morning. Sorry, ok? »
Send.

Kyuhyun isn’t very good with words, so he writes just that, and he hopes it’s enough for his hyung to understand that he does mean it. It isn’t long before Youngwoon replies and Kyuhyun’s cellphone vibrates first, then it emits a loud melodic jingle. He gives a faint start and scrambles for the phone; he clutches it hard in both hands as to suffocate the sound before Sungmin wakes up, but his attempt fails and the older boy is looking up at him already with sleepy eyes.

“Mmh?” is all the blonde can say, his large brown eyes blinking towards Kyuhyun’s general direction in a feeble attempt to adjust to the darkness. The younger doesn’t say anything, though; he simply places his finger on the other’s mouth to silence him. He doesn’t want to speak about this, not in their manager’s presence at least, so he lets his finger trace the soft curves of Sungmin’s mouth until the latter lets himself slip back into slumber. Then, finally, Kyuhyun slides his cellphone open with a click, already knowing whose text message it was.

« Have you made up with Min? » Kyuhyun smiles, eventually realizing just how precious and forgiving and caring Youngwoon actually is. He spends the last few minutes of the ride rapidly exchanging texts with Youngwoon. His hyung, eager to know all the juicy details, shows very obvious signs of disappointment upon hearing that the two’s reunion was so clean, so chaste; so Kyuhyun suggests that he goes online and looks for some hard rated Kyumin fanfictions to satisfy his perverted needs.

Kyuhyun sighs in relief, his hyung’s playfulness seemingly able to finally relax him completely. As the car halts near a familiar tall building, the sleeping boy is shaken awake; he hisses a little at the thought of having to walk all the way to the elevator and up into their own apartment. The manager drops them off first and tells them to go inside quickly — you never know what rabid fans are capable of — then he drives off to the reserved parking lot.

Once out of the car and up on his feet, though, Kyuhyun’s arms come around Sungmin and lift him up easily, gently, carefully; as if he were made of crystal. Sungmin doesn’t protest, doesn’t see why he should; he doesn’t want to strain the younger boy, but his desire for body contact, for that warmth and reassurance, is still there, and it seems to freeze his mind and devour all his worries. His arms encircle Kyuhyun’s neck and he draws his head closer and closer to the other’s, fully closing the ridiculously short distance that was still separating them.

The doors of the elevator ding open and the younger boy carries Sungmin inside with little effort, so imperceptible that neither seems to notice. They don’t speak; Kyuhyun stares at their reflection in the dirty mirror on the wall of the small cab, wanting to say something but his mouth seems sealed as if he were still sort of afraid of saying the wrong thing. His hyung’s gaze is fixated on the rather big ear currently protruding from under a layer of thick, untamed, dark hair. He seems close to falling asleep again, but then he surprises Kyuhyun: one of his tiny hands forcefully pulls his head down, and just as Sungmin’s lips come in contact with his ear, he whispers; breath hot and tickling skin. “Make love to me. Please.”

And Kyuhyun knows he will do just that as he smiles predatorily at the squirming boy in his arms.

It’s a mere two hours later that Sungmin lays panting and trembling on Kyuhyun’s bed as the latter lets himself fall back on the mattress, next to him, exhausted. Never had sex been so sweet, so loving and yet so full of passion between them. A look of sheer satisfaction graces the older boy’s features, unable to hide his joy. Sungmin doesn’t seem to be disturbed by the absence of the other two usual occupants of the room: Jungsoo’s bed and Ryeowook’s are done, still, and clearly empty. When Kyuhyun noted it as he entered the room to grab his pillow, realization hit him cold, utterly logical: Youngwoon must’ve told them. He knew where they were. Jongwoon was probably currently serving as Ryeowook’s pillow, considering that he himself had been Ryeowook’s pillow ever since he had been granted a bed. And Jungsoo… well, he only knew that Youngwoon would’ve thanked him in the morning, too.

“I love you.”

A weak voice breaks the thin thread that was connecting Kyuhyun’s thoughts, causing him to gasp. As he turns around, he finds himself face to face with the boy who just spoke so softly. Little smiles, like butterflies, alighting on his swollen lips and gone again. Sungmin looks beautiful; his smooth moist skin, pale like ivory, seems to glow in the dark, reflecting the moonlight peering in from the window. Enraptured by this delicate sight, Kyuhyun leans as close as he can get and kisses Sungmin on every bit of skin he can reach.

Sungmin’s face is crossed by a meek expression, totally submitting to the other and adjusting to his rhythms. Never had he heard Kyuhyun pronounce those same words, it had been him only; always, constantly, only him to verbally express his feelings. For a brief instant regret rushes through his mind, but he defiantly resists it and forces himself to fall back into reality. Suddenly Kyuhyun is on him, straddling his waist; a haze of gold, perhaps a mere flash of light, is reflected in his orbs as they bore directly into the older boy’s.

They stay like that, for minutes; simply gazing into each other’s eyes as if they were silently communicating. Kyuhyun is shaking faintly, Sungmin can feel it, but he thinks it’s simply due to the lack of energies. Little does he know that Kyuhyun is tried and anxious; yet his gaze is intense and unyielding: eyes never leaving Sungmin’s, never. His breathing is still irregular and heavy, and once he’s inhaled deeply, Sungmin is invested by words he never had imagined coming his way.

“I love you, Lee Sungmin.”

The smaller boy is paralysed for a nanosecond, his mouth slightly parted; then, he throws his arms up and around Kyuhyun’s body, pulling him down onto him, their bare chests sticking together with perspiration. It’s only moments later that Sungmin lets go, suddenly feeling much lighter and rejoiced; neither of the two seems to want to sleep — or be able to sleep — thus Sungmin heads out of the room first, silently motioning for Kyuhyun to join him in the shower.

Kyuhyun sits up in bed and as he runs his fingers through his damp hair, slicking it back, a bluish light catches his attention. He reaches for its source; identifying it as Sungmin’s cellphone, his gaze falls on its external display, reading: '1 New Message'. Kyuhyun knows he shouldn’t touch anything, but he’s curious and his fingers act faster than his brain.

« You two are such brats~ V^-^V ♡ »

Upon reading what the top of the display indicated — the sender being Sooyoung — Kyuhyun can’t help it; no matter how hard he tries, no matter how innocent those words are, he fails to fight off the surge of possessiveness pervading his senses. Soon he finds himself sneering at the phone as he starts punching in a sincere, heartfelt message in response: « Fuck off. »

He pushes send in distaste and glares one last time at Sungmin’s cellphone threateningly, as if he were daring her to send yet another of her stupid, useless, uncalled for messages. He waits for a moment to make sure she has given up; then, he deletes all evidence and places the phone back on the nightstand. As if nothing ever occurred, he didn't do anything.

Screw changing, he thinks as he stumbles up and off his bed to join the other boy in the shower; I'll do it tomorrow.

And Kyuhyun doesn’t know, or perhaps he ignores, that he’s hurt Sungmin once more.

¹ Lee Kichan, “Mi in” (one of Sungmin’s favourite songs)
² Kyuhyun’s line in SM TOWN “Snow Dream”

Comments: this story contains a lot of little true facts about Super Junior and other unrelated stuff; if you watched the movie “Signs”, you might better understand Donghae. Also, in case you didn’t know, Hyukjae’s PMP is filled with adult videos. Lastly, this story contains a refrence to Katherine Mansfield's writing.

I only like 3/4 of it. I should hire people to find good endings for my stories.

#002 [ONE-SHOT] Eccentric Mind.

2007-01-07T04:14:46Z

Title: Eccentric Mind.
Author: kyuppuccino
Pairing: Sungmin / Kyuhyun (hint of Kangin / Sungmin)
Rating: R (implied sex, curse words)
Summary: Kyuhyun refuses to let go of Sungmin, regardless of their break up.
Word-count: 1412 words.
Comments: at the bottom of the page.

“Don’t think I will let you again, Kyuhyun.”
“Why not?” A mischievous tone could be heard in response, “You always say that.”
“Because… I’m not yours anymore.” The shorter boy replied hesitantly, yet baring his teeth in a feeble attempt to look menacing; but the other knew better, much better.
“And that should stop me?” Kyuhyun spat back with a joyless laugh.
Unable to find an argument adequate enough to convince Kyuhyun to soften the grasp he had on his wrist, Sungmin abruptly jerked his arm away and tried to make an escape; the other boy was quicker, though, strong with a vein of fury pervading his system.

In the flash of a second Sungmin was roughly pressed back against the wall with a shove; familiar tears began to form in his eyes, blurring his view until he closed them… willing them away with all his heart. He was angry; angry with himself for being so weak in such circumstances and letting this happen, angry with Kyuhyun for refusing to give up, and angry with Youngwoon because he wasn't there to stop them. And he needed him; he desperately needed him like you need water to extinguish a fire, because that’s exactly what Kyuhyun was: a damaging fire that had enveloped him and was gradually consuming him, inside and out.

It had been three months since they had broken up and it was inconceivable for Sungmin that Kyuhyun wouldn’t let go, when it had clearly been him to put an end to their tumultuous relationship. Stop clinging onto me like a damn parasite and get a fucking life hell you are suffocating me — Kyuhyun’s words replayed in his brain incessantly, haunting him in his dreams and undermining his sanity when he felt the most vulnerable. Anywhere and at just about any given opportunity, regardless of who could’ve easily become an inconvenient witness, Kyuhyun would still attempt to seduce him. With words? Oh, no. That was for pussies and hopeless romantics like himself. Obstinate and persistent as he was, Kyuhyun knew other ways. He'd touch Sungmin in places he would never let a friend (and more reasonably an ex) touch, and he'd kiss him with a force and a passion he’d never experienced, nor tried before. He’d violate him and humiliate him. Sungmin felt dirty and used: Kyuhyun was only taking advantage of him, his violent behaviour further fuelled by his weakness. A person like the one standing before his eyes… was incapable of loving, and that Sungmin knew well.

Five months they spent together; five months in which Sungmin felt defenseless, powerless and on the verge of a nervous breakdown. Throughout those numerous days, Kyuhyun never bothered to tell Sungmin he loved him, nor any other type of sweet, caring words. He never tried to make him feel wanted and precious and essential. It was a game of sudden urges and of passing fancies; it was an impure game in which Kyuhyun and Kyuhyun only was allowed to decide and set rules, and although Sungmin had caught on soon after… he let him continue to play. He let him abuse him, because he, Lee Sungmin, loved Cho Kyuhyun like a puppy and its owner.

Not particularly attracted to him on a sexual level (although he would’ve never denied the beauty this boy had been blessed with), it had been Kyuhyun’s voice and his mesmerizing eyes (as cliché as it may sound) that tricked Sungmin. Hell, he had never even considered hugging another man before. All it took was a song, a melody he heard Kyuhyun hum one evening and he stupidly fell for it. However, Sungmin was never one to make the first move and it wasn’t until Kyuhyun moved in with the rest of the group that their crude adventure started.

The apartment was relatively small and obnoxiously crowded, definitely not projected for nearly a dozen of hyperactive and messy young men. As a result of this, Kyuhyun had been given the forlorn opportunity to choose between sleeping on the floor and taking the couch. Little did Sungmin know that offering to share a bed would’ve brought him so much sorrow. In all of his blinding generousness, he failed to see the unpleasantly predatory and frightening look that painted Kyuhyun’s eyes.

Time was precious for Kyuhyun and that’s why he didn’t dare to waste a single day; that very night, as he was graciously slipping under the covers next to the smaller boy’s body, hesitation was the last thing his mind could’ve been overcome with. He let himself indulge in Sungmin’s kindness. Bold and fierce as Kyuhyun was, Sungmin turned out to be the freshly designated victim of his raw, intense desire. Mouth, tongue, teeth and hands sought something to taint, which they immediately found in Sungmin’s virgin body. Obscenity and corruption was all Sungmin could think of; he felt disgusted in himself, yet he quickly made of Kyuhyun his boyfriend, the one who caused him to bite into the pillow every night, every night.

Lost in love, Sungmin was an eager participant, obliging to each and every game Kyuhyun wanted to play. He’d scream and arch his back demanding more, only to end up crying and trembling, begging and pleading for Kyuhyun to stop. But Kyuhyun, well… he never learnt to stop on command. Lust, he found, made his brain malfunction and overheat.

Contrary to what Kyuhyun had initially thought, though, Sungmin wasn’t easy. He was simply naïve, exquisitely inexperienced and innocent. Kyuhyun had charm and he knew it, he knew his means well and he could understand people far more than anyone could ever imagine by just silently hanging around them and secretly observing. Quiet and kind: that was only a façade and Sungmin soon found out at his own expenses.

It didn’t take a genius to understand that all Kyuhyun was after was sex, but Sungmin was determined to disregard the livid bruises decorating his flesh, because Kyuhyun left him breathless with kisses and speechless with a glance; and during the brief instant it would take his boyfriend to reach orgasm, the awareness of his hands firmly clutching onto his hips, thighs or neck made him feel genuinely needed. That… that alone was enough for Sungmin to refuse admitting that the aftermath of intercourse was always a cruel reminder of the mere physicality of their relationship.

Kyuhyun was eccentric, with a curious sense for aesthetics and a vicious fetish for mirrors; whenever he was furious, he’d force Sungmin to concentrate on their reflection as he would abuse of him — his angry eyes penetrating him far deeper than his body ever could. Nevertheless Sungmin felt highly fascinated by the diversity of this creature, his originality characterized him with genuineness and a strong individualism, and perhaps that was also what dragged Sungmin further into their enigmatic relationship. A secret and illicit passion dominated their time together — a passion that had to be kept hidden from their friends. If by any chance Sungmin’s swinging mood and bruised body was the object of a question, he would shrug it off with a smile, because he, Lee Sungmin would never even think of disobeying Cho Kyuhyun.

In all honesty, Kyuhyun had the unusual ability to colour Sungmin’s mind during the day; the world would become iridescent and cosy and Sungmin smiled a bright smile and his eyes shone with fleeting joy. It was only at night, only at night that he was torn between wishing to be colour-blind or simply… blind. It was a touch, only a touch, but it was enough to crush and erase all his dear memories. Sungmin had never wanted to be someone else’s toy; you’d think it was banal, perhaps even silly, but he had always dreamt of fairytale romance.

And if it was just by a sad casualty that Sungmin’s eyes shut close that day, preventing him from seeing Kyuhyun’s tear stricken eyes… it was definitely by a jest, a cruel trick of destiny, that a deep voice began to insistently call out Sungmin’s name, shaking him from his disheartening reverie.

S-Sungmin… wait — but the words got stuck in Kyuhyun's throat and his painful confession fell unheard from his lips; a soft whisper that was soon lost in the cool air that surrounded him, because, when he opened his eyes… Sungmin was gone.

I’m sorry I never learnt to love you right… his gaze stared into the emptiness of the wall as his fist connected with it.

★

kyuppuccino
On a lighter note, this is one of the thirty-six fanfictions I have started in 2006.
Now I'm down to thirty-five, I shall consider it an accomplishment for 2007! :D
I liked this fic much better before editing it, though. Now I'm not so sure…
I should never be allowed to edit my own fics when I'm tired. -_-
I don't like the last three paragraphs. T-T

#001 [ONE-SHOT] No Right to.

2006-09-24T19:56:43Z

Title: No Right to.
Author: kyuppuccino
Focus: Kyuhyun, hint of Yesung / Ryeowook.
Rating: PG (curse words)
Summary: it’s Super Junior's 300th day, all of the boys, but one, celebrate the anniversary.
Word-count: 2154 words.
Comments: at the bottom of the page.

You can hear them sing at the top of their lungs and laugh in their drunken state all the way from your room, even though the door is locked and your radio is blasting random songs at an insanely high volume. You have hopelessly tried to suffocate the loud noises coming from the living room, but they’re still too loud for you to ignore them. You think you’d rather listen to the moans and screams of a couple having sex, instead of this. Why? Because longing for sex would simply make your body hurt physically, but this… this makes your heart ache, and nothing can fix it. Nothing, or so you think.

You do want to be there with them, more than anything else, yet you feel like you don't have the right to join them in their celebrating adventures — you just can’t, it’s so obvious. You weren’t there since the beginning, you only saw them on television and although you watched every performance, you were nothing more than a stranger to the group. You remember thinking that, even though the idea of a twelve member group was stupid, those guys had the guts to try something that crazy, and you respected them for being brave enough to take such a risk. Soon after the idea of a ridiculously crowded group didn’t sound that ridiculous anymore, at least to you; each and every one of those boys had talent and you were actually envious of them. You wanted your chance too.

Your chance unexpectedly came seven months later the group’s debut, and the news shocked you to the point that you pulled through numerous sleepless nights. Should I accept, or not? The thought tortured you for so long that one day you realized your fingernails were nearly non-existent. You had never bitten your fingernails before. You still think you made the right decision, and you’re happy, and you wouldn’t have it any other way. However, you weren’t there with them when they were shedding tears and suffering due to the seemingly never ending training years. You are and yet are not part of Super Junior.

Out of the blue, you realize that you’re crying, but you don’t understand why exactly. This was your goal, your achievement, your dream. Why the tears, then? You don’t even bother to wipe at them, because no one is there to see you, or to ask you why you are crying anyway. You just wrap your arms around your legs loosely, and let your head rest on them, waiting for whatever is upsetting you to go away and leave you the fuck alone.

Deep down you think you know what is upsetting you. Actually, you do know, but you pretend you don’t. It’s not working though, you tell yourself. And, honestly, it really isn’t working, because images of what may be taking place in the other room begin to haunt you in the span of a millisecond. You feel left out, lonely and out of place. You feel like you don’t belong here in this house right at this moment, yet you don’t want to leave.

You tell yourself that you are happy. You are genuinely happy to be part of Super Junior, but every time the group wins an award or celebrates anniversaries, you try to go as unnoticed as possible. You hide at the side or back of the stage, further apart from the rest of the members; well, at least you try to, because your gigantic height definitely doesn’t go as unnoticed as you wish. This is why you can sigh in relief once you’re in your room at the dorm, safe, and alone, waiting for everything to be over and back to normal.

The distinct sound of your growling stomach distracts you a little from your overwhelming thoughts, but only a little. You wish it were tomorrow already… when another day will be added to the three-hundred that your fellow members spent together, and that single extra day will make today’s celebration lose all of its importance. Only a few more hours, I can do this, I can endure it.

Suddenly, the door of your room slides wide open and you realize it merely because the noises from the living room grow louder for a moment, until two giggling boys slip in holding hands and close the door behind their back. One of them turns the radio off as the other quietly walks towards your bed, but you don’t want to look up just yet because your eyes are still brimming with tears. And you bet they’re red and puffy. And your nose becomes a funny shade of crimson when you cry, but whose nose doesn’t after all? You don’t want them to see that you are crying, you want to present them with your contagious smile and big, sparkling black irises as you always do.

Your face is still hidden and you find that it’s the perfect chance to wipe your tears without them noticing. You exhale deeply, but silently, as you gradually start peeking at the two forms before you from behind your arms. The corner of your lips pull up at an awkward angle, baring your perfect teeth unnaturally, but you hope it’s convincing enough to grant you the freedom you so much wish for. Sadly, all of your efforts last only for a good split second, before you start bawling and crying your eyes out at the sight of their sincerely smiling faces.

What the hell is wrong with me?, you ask yourself, because you thought you were stronger than this, really. You just can’t believe you gave in to the sorrow so quickly and easily. All you had to do was fake a quick smile and they would’ve left you alone. Left you alone. Again. It’s ok. It will be ok.

Your mind is a whirlwind of funny emotions and you can barely make out a measly rational thought that could let you get away with the pathetic crying that you can’t seem to be able to control any longer.

You curse under your breath, because you didn’t really want them to see that you, too, are weak. They exchange a few barely audible words and nod as they proceed to sit on either side of you, making the bed shift under their weight. You desperately want to ask them why they are here, yet you want them to go away. Your mouth is dry and you don’t want your voice to crack on top of that, because your tears are doing a damn good job already at making you look miserable.

“Kyuhyun-ah…” Ryeowook speaks first; his sweet, soft voice calms you down instantly, like your mother’s lullabies. “What’s wrong?”

You turn to look at him, yet you avoid his eyes. You don’t answer him, because you don’t have a real answer in the first place and you know he asked you only because he wants to hear your voice. He knows, you can see it in his eyes, but honestly, you don’t know how to express your feelings without sounding pitiful and you don’t want to talk to him anyway!

A tingling sensation at the base of your neck catches your attention and you move just enough to see that the other boy is tickling your skin softly. Jongwoon hyung and his weird habits, you think, but the slightly warm body contact makes you feel a little reassured, and wanted. You wish he wouldn’t stop, and you fight the urge to lean into it.

“Kyuhyun-ah,” Ryeowook raises his voice a little as he places his hand on your thigh. “Come join us, what are you doing here by yourself? We have to celebrate our anniversary!”

Still refusing to utter a word, you can’t help but look at him with pleading eyes. You’re hoping he will catch on and let you be, but in all honesty, you’re coming off as a stray puppy that is in search of a warm shelter. You don’t want to play this game anymore, why can’t they just leave? You’re so tired; the tears are slowly consuming you.

“Listen,” Jongwoon unexpectedly talks, startling you, “We all know why you are upset, it’s pretty obvious. What we don’t get is why you still want to be so fucking stubborn when everyone here is treating you like a friend. You’re not just a member of the group, Kyuhyun, you’re a friend. We’re all friends and if you can’t acknowledge that yet, then I don’t know what else we have to do.” He pauses for a second, long enough to take a sharp intake of breath, as if saying all this were hurting him too. “I thought you were smart, and naive, but I didn’t think you were stupid. There are no stupid people in Super Junior, keep that in mind.”

Once done with his monologue, he leaves the room, without even throwing one last glance at you. You did catch the provocation in his words, yet there was a hint of care underlying them. Much to your surprise, the tears stopped falling, your face is burning hot now. Ryeowook squeezes your thigh, managing to avert your attention on him.

“Kyuhyun-ah, we know you have not been in Super Junior for three-hundred days…” his eyes boring into yours, and you can feel his breath on your face, “but you struggled with us for one-hundred and two days, and that is enough for us to want to have you in the other room and enjoy your company.”

Your eyes widen considerably at that, taken aback by the fact that he had kept count of something you thought didn’t matter to him, and the rest of the boys, at all. You don’t know yourself how many days it had been since you joined the group. Ryeowook really was a good friend, Jongwoon was right. How could you be so stupid, so blind?

“You can be the magnae…” Ryeowook tries to make you laugh, “but you’ll have to call me hyung, just once.” He successfully manages to make you snort a little due to your stuffed nose. His eyes twinkle beautifully upon seeing your reaction, his smile widening more than humanly possible, but it doesn’t surprise you anyway, he’s an angel, rules don’t apply to him. Someone this pure can’t be human.

The room is enveloped in a thin silence as you feel trapped under the older boy’s stare. He looks at you expectantly, he seems honest. You know he would never lie to you when you’re upset. You hesitate a little as he rises from his position on the bed and stretches his arms out towards you, waiting for you to grab each one of those tiny hands. Sighing in defeat, yet feeling happy like you’ve never been before, you reach for his hands and let them pull you off the bed and on your feet. Then, he pushes you lightly towards the bedroom door, smiling in contentment, waiting for you to twist the doorknob.

“Whoa… Kyuhyun!” his shriek nearly makes you jump.

“Y-yeah?” You stop in your tracks as you were opening the door, leaving it ajar. You wonder for a second what may have caused such a reaction from him, yet you aren’t sure whether you want to know now, because you already have an idea of what it could be.

“When are you going to do something about that big butt of yours?" he chirps teasingly, poking one of your butt cheeks before dashing towards the door and running off tittering like a girl.

You just laugh at his innocence, and you know the fans love your butt anyway, thus you won’t make a big deal out of it. You aren’t as picky as Sungmin after all. Ryeowook’s words are soon forgotten as you make your way to the living room, where the other members have started thrusting their hips nearly in your face as they sing ‘U’, replacing the word girl with your name, totally killing the melody.

Amidst all this chaos, you think you can hear Youngwoon’s voice from the kitchen. “Kyuhyun, you’re an idiot!” He says laughing, but you smile, like an idiot, of course.

“It was about time!” Another voice you recognize as Siwon’s says, as two strong arms encircle your waist and pull you towards the taller, warm body behind you. “You’re just in time for the games! We’re playing with the PSP, the winner gets cake!”

His fingers gently tilt your chin towards the kitchen, just as Jungsoo is coming out holding a cake, the numbers 300 and 102 clearly written on it with chocolate syrup. “Wanna join the game?” he winks at you as he settles the cake on the floor.

Tears of happiness start tracing a path down your cheek once more, but this time, this time you don’t need to wipe them away. Let them witness your tears.

★

kyuppuccino
Last time I actually finished writing a fanfiction was well over two years ago, and this is actually my first time writing a 2nd person narrator story. I got the idea for this fic today while I was cleaning my room, and wrote it tonight out of the blue. Nothing spectacular, yet decent — I merely wanted to write something for the boys’ anniversary. ^^ I’m posting it now because I know that if I waited until tomorrow morning I would just delete it, lol (although it's 6 AM already!)

NB. This quote ' When are you going to do something about that big butt of yours?' is based on true facts.
Ryeowook always tells Kyuhyun that he has a big, round butt. He confessed it on a radio show recently.
The eternal magnae is evil. ♡ This is what made me want to write the story~